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Sunday, May 1, 2011

TMI- means nothing to me

As a mom, you learn quick to get over what most people think is TMI. Poop, Puke, Pee, basically anything that starts with the letter P! As a caregiver, it is pretty much the same thing, but you have to get over it all over again. Because as much as the person is functioning like a toddler (with the speech, eating, sleeping, etc) it is NOT the same as your 3 year old, no matter what you tell yourself!
And can I just say that as a pregnant caregiver, it is a whole new lesson. As know!

This week has been that get over it and quick week. We started it off slowly, getting over Easter's festivities. She spent most of Monday and part of Tuesday in bed sleeping. Wednesday was a fairly good day, asking for a walk. Thursday was also good, spending some time sitting outside. But by Friday that was over, and by Saturday we realized that the "good" days are probably all behind us.

I am a mom, I good at wiping hands and faces clean. The table too. Convincing a preschooler that a bath and nail clippings, really are not the work of the devil, well---I am working on it! But this week has given me two new cleaning poop off of hands, items in the bathroom and under nails. I know I am a super lucky mom that my kids never turned into the poop monkey's I have heard other kids turn into! And can I just say, that the smell of poop from a grown, dying adult is horrific....maybe it is just the baby in the growing belly, but really awful!

This week brought other challenges as well. She has seemed to lose her sense of hot and cold, esp in her mouth. She wants food, lots of food, right NOW. Problem is, sometimes those things are pipping HOT. She isn't phased by this at all, a fresh cup of coffee, gone in 2 drinks. Dinner straight out of the oven, no worries, gone in just a few bits. I am not sure what to do about this....I mean, seriously. Her speech is slurred all the time. I feel so bad, because at least half the time I just can't understand her. No matter how many times she says it. That has to be soooo hard on her-she can't fend for herself and now she can't communicate what she wants or needs. Tonight or tomorrow I will be working on flashcards of sorts, to help her communicate with us. Since she has always always had trouble with writing and reading, this is our best option. As I am sure those things are long gone now.

Her breathing seems to be much more labored now. Not a good sign for anyone, esp not for her... Her left side (where she already had weakness, a side effect of one of the 03 brain surgeries) is pretty much useless, not quite but almost dead weight. This makes it very hard for walking, and standing, and really just about anything. I pray daily for God to literally give me the strength to help her. Literal strength!

Good things happened this week too! I mean not everything in my life is bad. Hospice came out this week, and I met 2 angels. Beth her nurse and Julie a social worker. What amazing ladies. Lots of help with everything! Bringing gloves, getting a hospital bed, commode, and wheel chair in here. And a respite volunteer to come once a week to give me a break! AH-MAZING!

And my awesome and not deserving of what is going on hubby, and I got to go out to lunch just us! I finally got to try Five Guys Burgers. Yes, I know, I am so behind! Greasy, but oh so good!

1 comment:

  1. Hi Ashlee,
    I hope that this blog is a good catharsis for you, and gives you the strength you need to care for your sister. I am praying for all of you,